I’m married now, but I’ve done the dating-after-a-relationship-ends thing, and I watched one of my best friends spend years trying to find the person she wanted to build a life with. She tried It’s Just Lunch and a few other matchmaking services along the way, so I saw pretty closely what she hoped paying for that help would solve and where it still got frustrating.

I never used a professional matchmaker myself, but if one of my single friends asked me now which service was worth looking into, I know what I’d want to dig into before telling them to spend this kind of money. I remember how much time dating can eat up, and I watched my friend learn that getting set up on dates and meeting people you actually connect with are two very different things.

That’s how I approached these It’s Just Lunch alternatives. I wanted to know what you’re really paying someone to take over and how much room they have to keep searching when an introduction doesn’t go anywhere. After comparing the options, I’d tell a single friend to consider local matchmakers if they’re available, or try Tawkify as a trusted national option. Their larger search pool and ability to recruit beyond it matter to me after watching how quickly my friend’s options could start to feel limited, and I like that there’s more built around the actual introduction too.

At A Glance

Service	Public Pricing	Search And Reach	Screening
Tawkify	Packages start at $4,900	3M+ network, with matches available across the country and recruiting beyond the existing network	Criminal-record and live video screening for every proposed match
It’s Just Lunch	Not publicly listed	Human matchmakers, with multi-city options available in some areas	No background checks
Three Day Rule	Premium memberships start at $6,300	250K+ network, standard service focused in major metro areas with broader options at higher service levels	Screening can occur, but is not described as universal for every proposed match
Kelleher International	$50,000 to $500,000	Highly customized national and international searches depending on service	Varies by service
Local Matchmaker	Varies widely	Usually concentrated in one city or region	Depends on provider
Dating Apps	Free and paid options vary	Large self-directed pools depending on the app and location	Depends on platform

What It’s Just Lunch Already Takes Off Your Plate

It’s Just Lunch is already a long way from sitting on your couch swiping through profiles. Clients work with a matchmaker who learns what they’re looking for, hand-selects introductions, coordinates the restaurant reservation, and collects feedback after the date. Client profiles stay private rather than being posted for other singles to browse.

I can understand why my friend tried it. She was going through medical training at the time, and dating was competing with an already ridiculous schedule. From the outside, she was the person you would assume would have an easy time dating. She’s beautiful, a doctor, has a great family, and knew she wanted marriage and kids. Her issue was having the time and energy to sort through people who might actually fit what she wanted.

If you have one free evening and you’re choosing between studying, sleeping, seeing your family, or going on a first date, I can see why paying someone to do some of that early sorting felt worth it to her. The hope was that she could spend more of her limited free time meeting people who were at least looking for the same kind of life.

Her experience also showed me the limit of what any matchmaker can do. An introduction could sound fine on paper and still be completely flat once they were sitting across from each other. I remember hearing about dates where the guy sounded perfectly nice, but she simply had no interest in seeing him again.

It’s Just Lunch guarantees that clients will go on dates and uses feedback to adjust future introductions. It does not conduct background checks, and its public FAQ doesn’t give a simple package price, so you need to speak with the company about the membership and cost available to you.

If I were on that call, I’d spend less time asking how many dates were included and more time asking what my actual search looked like after location, age, lifestyle, relationship goals, and true deal breakers were factored in.

A Local Matchmaker Could Be Worth A Call

If I knew I wasn’t moving and had no interest in dating someone hours away, I’d see if there was a good local matchmaker before assuming the biggest national network was automatically the answer.

Someone who has been matchmaking in the same area for years may know the local dating pool incredibly well. Before paying, I’d want to hear how many active people they currently have who are anywhere near what I’m looking for, whether they recruit outside their existing contacts, and what happens when that pool gets thin.

I live somewhere where driving 40 minutes is pretty normal, but I’m not sure I’d want that built into every first date. I’d rather have a slightly awkward conversation about geography before signing a contract than find out later that the matchmaker and I have very different definitions of “nearby.”

Why Tawkify Is The First National Alternative I’d Compare

That limited pool is an issue though, and so we return quickly to the national brands. Tawkify has a similar starting point to It’s Just Lunch. Paying clients get a dedicated matchmaker who gets to know their relationship history, lifestyle, values, goals, location, preferences, and what they’ve learned from past relationships before beginning the search. The company currently lists more than 3 million singles in its network, with matchmakers able to search beyond the existing database when needed.

A network of 3 million obviously gets a lot smaller once you factor in where you live, age, attraction, relationship goals, and the things you really aren’t willing to compromise on. Still, if I were paying someone to search for me, I’d rather they have a bigger pool to start with.

What stuck with me from my friend’s experience was how quickly the options could start to feel limited once one match didn’t go anywhere. The men she met weren’t necessarily bad matches on paper, but that didn’t mean she felt a connection with them. If I were paying for matchmaking, I’d want to know what the search looks like after those first few introductions don’t work out. Are they actively finding new people, expanding the search area, or sitting down with me again to figure out whether something in my original criteria needs to change?

In addition, Tawkify takes over quite a bit around the introduction itself. Every proposed match receives a criminal-record screening and live video screening, and clients get custom date planning and a feedback process after dates. Its current service information also lists access to matches outside a client’s immediate area, with broader search locations available depending on the package.

The feedback part interests me because an intake conversation can only tell a matchmaker so much. Someone can check everything you said you wanted, and then you meet them, and something is missing. I’d want to know what the matchmaker takes from that and whether it actually changes who they look for next.

Tawkify currently publishes client packages starting at $4,900, with the final cost depending on the package and level of service. At that price, I’d have a lot of questions about what my particular search would look like before I signed anything.

Screening Would Matter To Me

The screening is one of the clearer differences between Tawkify and It’s Just Lunch. Tawkify says every proposed match gets a criminal-record screening and live video screening, while It’s Just Lunch says it doesn’t do background checks.

I’d rather have that extra step in there. It obviously doesn’t tell you everything about a person or mean you can completely let your guard down, but if I’m paying someone to do some of the vetting before a date, I want to know what they’re actually checking.

I like the privacy part too. Client profiles aren’t public, which I can see being especially nice if you work with patients, clients, coworkers, or just live somewhere where you seem to know everyone. I wouldn’t necessarily want my dating life floating around publicly just because I was trying to meet someone.

I’d Have To Think About The Blind-Date Part

Tawkify has options to set up blind dates, where you intentionally don’t exchange photos before the date, although physical preferences are still part of the matching process.

I get why they offer this. Dating apps give us endless opportunities to overanalyze people before we ever meet them, and I’m sure plenty of potentially good dates have ended because someone didn’t love one particular picture. 

I don’t know if I’d go for this option, but having it available is nice. Likewise, knowing the person has already gone through the screening I just mentioned would make that easier for me. I’d still have to decide whether I was comfortable giving up the photo beforehand, but I wouldn’t feel quite as much like I was walking in cold.

Three Day Rule Offers More Around The Dating Process

Three Day Rule currently lists premium memberships starting at $6,300 and says its network includes more than 250,000 relationship-ready singles.

Depending on the membership, there can be more wrapped around the matchmaking itself, including dating strategy, photography, styling, and feedback. Someone who hasn’t dated in years may appreciate having help with things they genuinely haven’t thought about in a long time. I’d personally put more of my money toward the candidate search than professional photos or styling, but I can see why someone else might value those things. Similarly, Tawkify has additional options for relationship coaching if that’s something you’d want.

Screening is one area where I would ask Three Day Rule very specific questions. Their public terms allow for criminal screening in some situations, but they don’t describe criminal-record screening as something every proposed match receives. I’d want the company to tell me exactly what happens before my introductions rather than assuming broad words like “screened” or “vetted” mean the same thing everywhere.

Kelleher International Is A Very Different Budget

Kelleher International pretty quickly became a different category once I looked at the current pricing. Its site says customized matchmaking can range from $50,000 to $500,000, with the exact investment depending on the complexity of the search. 

Their big selling point is that their pool is tailored to celebs, CEOs, athletes, and other ‘higher profile’ individuals. Still, I wouldn’t assume paying $100,000 makes two people like each other any more than paying $6,000 does!

For someone who has the budget and only wants to meet people in the same sphere of society, that level of service may be exactly what they’re looking for. It just isn’t the same financial decision as choosing between matchmaking services that start in the several-thousand-dollar range.

Dating Apps Still Have A Place

I wouldn’t rule out apps just because professional matchmaking sounds appealing. They cost a lot less, you can see who you’re considering before you meet, and you decide for yourself who you want to talk to.

Of course, that means you’re doing all of the searching too. You’re browsing profiles, messaging, trying to figure out who is actually serious, making plans, and starting over when something fizzles.

I remember enough from dating again to know that it doesn’t take a string of horrible dates to get tired of it. Sometimes you’re just tired of having the same getting-to-know-you conversation again and wondering whether this one is actually going anywhere.

That’s where I think the decision between an app and a matchmaker really comes down to time and how much of the search you want to handle yourself. If you don’t mind doing that part, I’m not sure I’d spend thousands of dollars just to avoid an app. If the searching itself is what has started wearing you down, I can understand paying someone to take more of it over.

My friend did eventually meet someone through a dating service after trying a few different things. I don’t know that there was some huge lesson in why that one worked, and the others didn’t. Sometimes you can meet someone who looks perfect on paper and feel absolutely nothing, and then another person just clicks. That’s part of why I wouldn’t write off apps or other lower-cost ways of dating just because professional matchmaking sounds more thorough. Having someone do the searching for you can save a ton of time, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re going to find the person you connect with first.

What I’d Ask Before Signing A Contract

Watching my friend go through this made me much more interested in the search than the number of dates included in a package.

I’d want to know how many realistic people are currently available within the distance I’m willing to travel and what happens after the first few introductions aren’t right. How often are new people recruited? Which of my preferences are being treated as firm, and where does the matchmaker think I may eventually need to be flexible?

The contract itself matters too. I’d get clear about what counts as one of my introductions, whether I can turn down a proposed match, what happens if the other person cancels, and whether I can pause the service if something changes in my life.

I’d want to understand how feedback actually moves through the process. If I’m explaining why something felt off after a date, I want that information reaching the person choosing who I meet next instead of disappearing into account notes somewhere.

Finally, I’d take the contract home before signing it. I watched how much hope my friend could put into each new possibility because she knew she wanted marriage and kids, was building a demanding career, and felt like time mattered. 

When you want something that badly, I think it would be pretty easy to get caught up in a sales conversation about finally finding the right person. I’d want to go home, look at the numbers and the contract again, and make the decision when I wasn’t sitting there imagining how it might all work out.